Let’s Get Real. #NEDAwareness

Let's Get Real. What I am about to write has been, and continues to be, a source of pain and struggle in my life. However, it is my struggle: one in which I take ownership and self-agency. It's National Eating Disorder Awareness Week (#NEDAwareness). I am joining in the conversation by sharing my story. My name …

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Wintersession 2018: Float On Alright

Earlier this January, I was meant to go on a service trip to Nicaragua. I flew to Boston a few days early to get settled, rest a little, and pack. The day before departure, I learned that my flight was cancelled. Bummer, but no big deal. I knew about the blizzard that was about to …

Hunger Strike

December 13 Relapse feels so easy it's almost like an old friend. It's scary to think that I buried those seeds so long ago, but they've been growing in the dark all this time. It's scary that even when I returned to a weight that was healthy for me, and carried on with desserts and …

Burning Clean, Emptier and Cry

It's dawned upon me that anorexia may be something I've never truly recovered from. Heck, I was never treated. Sometimes I question whether my illness was ever real, if no one noticed it at its worst. This past week, I can only recount two solid meals and two bowls of miso soup in my diet. …

Outshined, Again

I'm faint, tired, shaking, and hungry without an appetite. My tongue is white from Candida overgrowth and my fingers tremble involuntarily. I haven't felt this frail and fragile in a while. I can't get any lower Still I feel I'm sinking A few weeks ago, I had a period where I felt nearly normal. I …

Have A Day.

October 16 I'm almost entirely right brained now, and I'm losing my capacity for language. Like in the split brain studies. Objectively speaking, I'm also at a higher risk of becoming suicidal than ever. Today, two professors called me "Grace" by accident. That doesn't seem like an accident. It's almost universal that I'm mistaken for …

I know, it’s been comin’.

September 24 A productive week finished, I left our college worship night with an earful of cliches concerning the Christian dilemma of being both needing to be disciplined by God while also being unconditionally loved by Him as His adopted child. I lay on my bed, teeth brushed and naked, and found no inclination to …

Four Temperaments Scale & Initial Thoughts

Hey all! Since I'm a bit of the reflective type, I decided to take the Four Temperaments personality test today. Here are my results, and my thoughts on the system. My main temperament is Melancholic, followed by Sanguine, and then Phlegmatic, and finally Choleric. I've included the results below so you can get a better …

Now a Member of AMWA – and why it matters

Just a quick update: Today I paid $25.00 to gain membership into the American Medical Women’s Association (AMWA), which will last me all my undergraduate years as a pre-medical undergraduate student. They are self-described as "The Vision and Voice of Women in Medicine Since 1915", and have several committees focused on the issues of female physicians …